Just like everyone else has likely done at some point in their lives, I have often pondered my destiny and fate. In the beginning, many believe the two to be the same; I am no different. What comes to mind as you ponder over the these? Do you think there is this overarching divine plan that is leading you somewhere, that is mapped out step-by-step along the way? Does this belief make you displace your mistakes on a higher power to rectify? Do you believe that everything that happens in your life, every decision you make is happening because it was pre-determined to happen? Do you think every act, every thought, is all part of a carved path leading to all your hopes and desires, the Holy Grail of more than you could have ever imagined? To discover a true understanding of the true essence of fate and of destiny, I had to combine my own inner wisdom from all of my lifetimes with a macro perspective of this individual life. I came to realize at some point along the way that destiny and fate are two entirely different concepts, and neither is what any previously conceived them to be.
There exists no step-by-step plan from the divine laid out for any one person’s life. This isn’t to say that soul contracts are a fallacy—in fact they are very real. They simply are not what they seem to be. It’s not necessarily a person’s fault for believing in a divine plan, or that everything is happening with a divine end goal in mind. We humans, in today’s society, have been so conditioned to believe that every single minute detail in every sense is important and plays an effective part. Look at legal matters nowadays for example: throw ethics out the window, as it’s not considered most important anymore in law. Now, the focus is always entirely on how the individual writ of law can be twisted and warped to support either side of the argument in a case. See this is a problem because as many know, every word has different meanings, both denoted and connotated, and any meaning of these can be combined to suit either side. This is all the law is now: dry words with one of any and all meanings applied for each individual case as is desired for a certain outcome. It’s not to say that generally accepted illegal acts aren’t unethical, they are; however, in contemporary society, proving it with written word takes precedence. There lies no justice in this. This is the opposite of a soul contract. A soul contract is not created with a pact full of many individual details mapped out and agreed to, it’s moreso a list of the main focuses of what you will learn by the end, or simply a main goal you are meant to experience. For example, I was sent here to learn self-love and discernment. However, there was no prior plan in place for how I would accomplish this, or if I truly even would. Here’s why:
Free will. Humans are gifted with free will. Everyone has the choice in any given circumstance to do whatever they desire to do, EVERYONE. Which is farther made difficult because no matter what you choose, others will always play their roles and react in any way they choose to of THEIR own free will.
I came to believe as part of my awakening process—originally in order to release my karma from the rapes, abuse, and harassment cycles—that these horrific experiences of mine were meant to happen as part of a larger divine plan for me to see that I needed to rebuild within my self-love, my trust in my own intuition, and that I needed to be assertive of my boundaries and protect myself because it’s no one else’s responsibility. This was because I was able to illuminate to myself my negative habits and behaviors only due to their influence on and attachment to these horrific events I certainly never wanted to repeat. But were these horrific events truly pre-determined and destined to happen?
No, they were not.
The divine is the embodiment of only light, love, abundance, and what is good in the universe. This includes the real, true you. You are light and love, and would never agree to experience such darkness. This darkness happens in direct response to humans’ acts of free will and choices made through the eyes of the ego and untruths. If a harrowing event occurs in your life that you did not directly choose or will to happen, it was because the other person involved chose it with their own free will. This event was not divine, but human.
Although everyone has their own free will, one person is only responsible and has influence over only their own will. No matter what you may choose in a situation, there lies infinite possibilities of how the other person involved may choose to react to your choice of will, and you cannot control their will. There exists a quote by the Dalai Lama that mentions that karma is based not on how you act, but how you react in any given situation. This aligns with the point here in this discussion. Because you cannot control another due to their own gift of free will, your karma lies in how you react to their reaction.
For example, I incurred karma from my abuse as a child because I chose to act in negative ways after the events (closing myself off to people, not being assertive of my healthy boundaries, subconsciously seeking validation from others, etc.). As I continued these behaviors, eventually I attracted people who chose to exploit these negative habits and take what they desired by force. Had I not reacted so poorly to the child abuse, and stayed my loving, playful self, I would not have created the opportunity for these people to create these harrowing events in the first place. This was my karma. Just as I acted of my own free will, these perpetrators reacted of theirs as well; therefore, we as humans created these experiences of darkness due to our own use of free will.
Now, this is where destiny and fate come into play. For any given situation or decision that must be made, no matter how small, there lies infinite possibilities of what may occur in response to that decision. Should you choose one option, what follows was fated to happen. Should you have chosen the other option, what follows that choice is a different fate that was meant to follow that choice. This means to say that fate is any possible outcome to a decision, and there are many that could occur. Fate is dependent on individual choices of free will.
Destiny is, as the root implies, moreso the end result or the destination one is meant to reach or achieve. One’s destiny is the destination one reaches at some point in one’s life, which has infinite paths that lead to it. These individual paths are paved by the individual steps of fate that occur along the way. Ultimately, destiny is the goal, and fate are the steps along the way that pave the path to that destiny. But even though your destiny was agreed to as part of your soul contract, it doesn’t necessarily mean it is inevitable because you can choose to do otherwise with your free will. You will ultimately keep living the human experience until you achieve that destiny.
So, what do I believe to be my destiny? I know I am destined in this lifetime to rebuild my self-love and trust, to learn to discern what aligns with my soul truth with the help of my spiritual gifts, and by living my life on the path of light, I will influence others into following their own light path, ultimately shifting the overall consciousness of the planet into the fifth dimension. This isn’t a forced shift, but one uplifted by my inspiration to others as a being of light and living according to my own inner truth. I’d like to think I will experience a love that has been many, many lifetimes in the making—one that aligns with the love I have for myself and for others—but since this will require a choice of free will from both parties, I cannot say this is my destiny. If this does truly come to fruition, it will be our destiny made manifest by the alignment of both our free wills. Exactly how I came to, or how I will achieve my destinies is based off my own free will in response to whatever may come to pass. I am confident I will achieve my destinies because I am mindfully choosing to make every decision based on my own inner truth and my light. I am making these decisions based on what I want to achieve in life.
It is only by realizing and accepting that both your destiny and fate are determined by only your own free will, that you can fully see the truth that you and only you can create whatever life you truly desire to manifest. You are the master creator of your own life, no one else, not even a higher power can do so. You do this by being mindful of your everyday choices, big or small, and making sure you decide based on your own soul truth. You make certain that your decisions align with what you desire and what you believe to be your destiny. This is the beauty in the gift of free will. So, if you believe that the creator of life is “God” or “the Source of Life”, this means that you are in fact your own God, your own Source, the Creator of your life. This aligns with what many say, that we are all directly part of the source of life, we are all divine, because we truly create our own life as the Creator. We truly can create any life we dream of and desire.
As you ponder your own life and go deep within to determine your soul truth, what do feel is destined for you? What destiny do you desire to create? What steps can you take to manifest this? What will you choose of your own free will at every crossroads you encounter?
Not Your Cup of Tea 